You're going to have bad days. It’s okay!
Highly sensitive friends, here is something I have really been forgetting lately: You are going to have bad days.
What? No? Really....
Yes, I know. This is obvious. This is the way the world works. The world needs the good and bad, yin and yang, equilibrium. So why is it so easy to forget?
If you grew up in the 90's like me, then you remember every show, every story, had a happy ending. All we watched were fairytales. People were always happy. Even if someone was angry, or upset, in 30 minutes to 1 hour, they were happy again and the show/movie would end. So all we saw was happiness. Ever thought of that?
I mean, I know every day will not be completely wonderful. I know that if I want to be happy, I have to choose to get through things differently and focus on the good aspects of even bad events. So why do I still expect every day to be magical?
Conditioning friend. Conditioning. The belief of constant joy and happiness is ingrained in my psyche. It is a belief I work to let go of. It does not mean I then expect bad things to happen.
It simply means I know I can be joyful even if not great things happened today.
It's not easy, let me tell you. It's usually not even fun. But if the choice is to wallow in how the day completely failed in your mind OR to look at how well you handled something and know that tomorrow will be even better. I choose the second belief.
Being a sensitive who often let sensitivities overcome me, I know the price of failing to make an effort to have a joyful mindset.
You are going to have bad days. Bad things will happen.
It doesn't mean you failed. It doesn't mean you are doomed. It's simply a fact of life. Like the sky being blue and the sun and moon rising and falling in their cycle. Bad things will happen sometimes. The amazing part is that it has no affect on who you are. You can choose whether it impacts your life in a bad way or if it is just something you experience and then you move on. You have the choice.
I promise, I understand it is not easy. I have the same battles. But when you choose to breathe, see the good and react from a good place within yourself. Everything is easier. Everything is resolved as if meant to. We are lucky enough to have this choice. Let's take it. Use it.
You are worth fighting for you know. Whether you have more bad days or good. It does not make you a bad person. We all do our best to grow as well as we can.
Here are a few quick tips to get out of a a bad day or a bad day cycle.
Recognize you are not in a good place! (Always the first and biggest step)
Once you realize you are in a bad state (however you define it) do something to get out of it! Whether itd a walk or a television shoe or playing with your adorable pet. Do it. Right now.
Once you’ve distracted the momentum, give yourself space to do some real self care. Cleanse your thoughts and your worries.
Do NOT blame yourself for your bad state. This will only put you back into a bad state and this is exactly what we are trying to prevent.
You have the tools. You have the skills. You have the power.
Feeling good is one distraction away. Then let it sink in and feel all the joy you are naturaly meant to feel.
As always, I’m here to help you in any way I can. My friends often tell me I’m a great therapist! :)